Well, first things first, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR everyone! May the year 2014 bring everyone prosperity, joy, and wealth in many ways possible! God bless!
It has been pretty long since I've updated my blog. I haven't actually found the time to write, let alone the motivation. I've actually started a mini-blog on Dayre where I can just update it on my iPhone but even that has got minimum posts on it. Somehow, it seems that those around me have got a more of an inspiration to actually update people on their lives. Me, on the other hand? Not so much.
Well, my second year in university has started off with many complications and loads of memories. Within a few months, I've lost friends whom at one point I cared for dearly. Debasish and Ahmad are no longer in my life. I've said what I had to say as a friend, telling them what is wrong, in a straightforward manner, and yet still, they took it like I was being too "emotional". I give my all for my friends as I know my best friends can attest for.I tell you my honest opinions and will tell you when you are doing something that is truthfully wrong. That is what I call a friend. You'd want the best for your friend and not to see them dig a deeper grave for themselves. In all my relationships, I either give my all or nothing.
Hence, I am really quite sad to let these people go. Yeah, I've heard that I'm too "emotional" and that I over-react over the smallest things. I've actually heard that a lot. But guess whose mouth it always comes out from? Yeap, it's always been said by those who I've left behind. Being emotional, makes me who I am and I am proud of who I am.
If I love you and care for you as a friend, I'd do anything for you to help you. If you'd call me in the middle of the night and said that you're stranded on the road with no money cause you got robbed, I'd be there. I'd be there without a thought, rushing to make sure you're safe.
Sometimes, it comes from the people who were supposedly a friend of mine.They end up going around fishing for hot juicy gossip from others, agree with them and then come back just to tell me what those people have said. What goes around, comes around. Karma bitches. I don't have to say much either as things happen for a reason. People find out who you truly are sooner or later. People have got so much to comment on when you're the one that speaks out for what you believe in.
Anyway, I've finally opened my eyes and found out so many things that were happening in the first year. Our class ended up being more distant than ever, probably cause by the fight between Debasish and I. Honestly speaking, I don't feel a significant change. I do feel a little sad that I have to break ties with some people but hey, people enter our lives and leave them for a reason. They come in to give you a lesson about life and leave when they're done teaching. That's God's way of letting us learn. I'll accept it humbly and live my life positively.
By the end of 2013, I faced another problem with friendship and friendship within business. I finally understand why our lecturers warned us about the consequences of businesses created with friends. We've made a mistake. Our business enterprise company is completely on its last strand of hope with the problems we're having. Some people cannot accept the fact that they are in the wrong. I've tried telling this particular group member about sharing and giving people space to do things. We've tried having group discussions and sharing how we feel about each other and the problems we might have but he/she does not want to express his/her feelings to the rest of us. The only way I can explain the situation is by identifying a person as a clam. Why a clam, you say? Well, because no matter how hot the boiling water is, if the clam is "dead" inside, it is never going to open. We are the boiling water, pressuring him/her to improve and do better, but no, his/her personality is the same as a dead clam.
Ah. So much frustration. Anyway, I'll look forward to the future. It is always bright ahead. Till next time people.
N.H.
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